Basil’s Blog

“He rode a Blazing Saddle, He wore a shining star, His job to offer battle …”

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“C’mon boys. The way you’s lollygaggin’ ’round here with them picks and them shovels … you’d think it was a hunnert and twenny degrees…”

“Cain’t be more’n a hunnert ‘n fourteen!”

“Ohhh!”

“Dock that Asian-American a day’s pay for nappin’ on the job.”

“How [...]

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Thanks, David Zucker, for the video. It puts it all in perspective!
Hat tip: Don Surber

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Click on the image to read from an actual screenshot from one of my email accounts. Yes, I did edit it by trimming off the top and bottom of the page. And by blurring the actual emails listed. But the sponsored link at the top is real.
It says: “If you don’t tell your children why [...]

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Avast, maties! It’s Talk Like A Pirate Day!
Ev’ry one o’ ye needs be talkin’ like a pirate today. This means all of ye!
If ye drives a cab, speak to yer passengers like ye are the scourge of the seas!
If ye answers the phone, answer in a way that all knows that ye are th’ one [...]

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It is good to be a woman …

We got off the Titanic first.
We can scare male bosses with any mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
Taxis stop for us.
We don’t look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
No fashion faux pas we make, could ever rival the Speedo.
We don’t have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.
If we [...]

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Based on a true story

Daddy, daddy! Come see Basil. He funny!

Ha ha! Yes, his Headlines are cute. But he missed a headline I saw Tuesday.

Funny headline?

Yes, it was. Let Daddy use the computer. I’m going to write Mr. Basil and tell him about it.

Daddy funny, too. Write funny letter, Daddy.

Okay, here goes:

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The legend lives on from Dekalb County down
To the edge of the Georgia 4th district
Of an elected fool who was oh, such a tool
And spewed loads of nonsense without restrict.
When the Towers went down she showed that she’s a clown
Saying Jews were the ones who’re behind it.
Denise Majette won the primary that some
Thought that Cynthia [...]

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I’m sure you know all about the Columbus Catfish running a promotion to name a night after one fan. And I’m trying to convince them that I’m the fan they should pick. And I’ve asked your help with that.
Well, I’m not asking you to fight my battles for me. I am asking for your help, [...]

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Let me explain. No, there is no time. Let me sum up:

The Columbus Catfish are running a promotion for a fan to get his (or her) own night at the ballpark.
I tried to have some fun with it by getting others to help promote me.
The guy at the Catfish wasn’t sure that was a good [...]

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Well, the “Basil Night” at the Catfish game campaign has made an impact.
But not a good one.
I appreciate your interest in August 25th and “Insert Your Name Here” Night. I must admit that the campaigning through your Site is a most creative way to garner support. However, in fairness, there are many “contestants” who do [...]

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